idle musings

Originally published at idle musings. Please leave any comments there.

I stopped at the movie theatre on my way home from work and bought a large bag of popcorn. I’ve been craving real movie theatre popcorn for a few days and microwavable popcorn just doesn’t cut it. Plus, it’s started to have a funny taste to it - the chemicals, maybe?

Now I have a giant bag that cost me over $6 that is maybe 1/4 eaten, sitting on my kitchen counter and stinking up my place. At least I’ll have something to munch on tomorrow when I get home from work and want instant tastebud gratification.

Originally published at idle musings. Please leave any comments there.

You may recall that I wrote this post recently, about feeling like a fatty mcfatterson when I went to buy some clothes.

Let me now tell you of my experience at Lane Bryant, specifically the one on 12th st nw in Washington DC.

I had heard about them through one of my favourite FA blogs, Shapely Prose. I looked them up online and thought what the hell - I may as well go check them out while I’m in the States.

As soon as I walked through the doors, I knew that this was going to be a shopping experience unlike I have ever had before. The clothes were awesome - great colours, lots of different styles, casual and more businessy. Before I even made it to the jeans wall, I had an armful of clothes I couldn’t wait to try on.

The cool thing about their jeans is that they have figured out that not all women are shaped the same. Therefore, they have Right Fit - figure out what colour you are, and then try on the different styles of jeans that fit that body type. We all know the horror of jeans shopping, right? You can never find anything that fits you properly? It’s a long, drawn out, frustrating endeavor that we try to avoid until the last pair of jeans that we have that fit are practically in shreds? (Ok well maybe that’s just me, but wev.) The first pair of ‘yellow’ jeans that I tried on fit me. I bought two. I mean, you find a good thing, you jump on it, yes?

I tried on a multitude of tops and dresses, and anything that I didn’t immediately love, I put in the discard pile. I didn’t have the problem of wondering if I would ever find anything that would fit, because the discard pile only ended up with about 3 items in it.

The staff were awesome. The girl who measured me got me different styles and colours of jeans to try on. She found me the most awesome pair of black dress pants that I have ever worn (in terms of comfort and cut). Another saleswomen told me how great the blue tank I was wearing went with my skin tone, and helped me to find other tops in the same colour. They were having a good time because I was having a good time - because I had found a place that had clothes that made me feel good. I didn’t feel like a fatty mcfatterson, even if I was buying clothes in the largest size I have ever needed. I felt sexy and fun and happy. This is what clothes shopping should be like for everyone.

I want to acknowledge my privilege up front - I do know that I am not that fat. I fit into the smallest two sizes that Lane Bryant stocks. I can find some clothes that fit me in so-called regular stores (it’s just all ugly as shit and twice as uncomfortable). I know that there are women (and men too, I’m sure) out there that are sized out of stores like Lane Bryant, and maybe will never experience a shopping trip like I did. And that sucks. It truly does. Everyone should be able to feel sexy and fun and happy in their clothes.

That said, the fact that Lane Bryant gets it to the extent that they do, and are catering to that larger slice of the market with awesome clothes and good prices means that they will definitely be getting repeat business from me, and I will be talking them up to any of my girlfriends who are 14+.

Yesterday, as I was unpacking and doing laundry, I looked at all my pretty new things and I looked at my closet, and I did a huge purge. I did a clothing purge just a few weeks ago, but this time I was ruthless. If an item didn’t make me feel like my new clothes did, and it didn’t serve a purpose (like work out clothes or comfies or pjs), then it was gone.

I have a much smaller wardrobe now, with much better items in it, and I am feelin’ fine.

Originally published at idle musings. Please leave any comments there.

The Customer is Not Always Right

Originally published at idle musings. Please leave any comments there.

Especially when you have a purring kitty to snuggle up with in bed.

The trip was great (see pictures and commentary here) but as always, traveling makes me realize just how much I love my city.

Originally published at idle musings. Please leave any comments there.

… And Why They’re Actually Not.

For anyone following the US election lead-up, this is a good read. Not only is it from one of my favourite feminist blogs but Melissa McEwan is one of my favourite bloggers. She’s got a way with words, that one.

Originally published at idle musings. Please leave any comments there.

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Originally published at idle musings. Please leave any comments there.

Originally published at idle musings. Please leave any comments there.

I was chatting with my dad tonight about where we are sitting in the plane for our flights down to DC and back, because he likes the window and I like the aisle, and I’m used to international flights having 2 seats, then 4 or 5 seats, then another 2. Our flights have 3 per side, which ruins everything because it means we will have a window and a middle seat. I wanted the aisle on the left (port? do you say port and starboard when it’s a plane?) side because it would allow me to stretch my bad leg out into the aisle. Instead, I’ll be smooshed in the middle.

I’m bringing my Ativan, just in case.

My dad, being my dad and never able to just say things straight out, made a comment along the lines that I do not have to worry for the flight there. Then we got off on a tangent about business class and first class. He’s flown both so I was asking him for the comparison between the two. He’s only flown first class from Heathrow to O’Hare as part of his trip home from Europe last year because there was no other option when flying on points. It’s not like he flies first class all the time - he’s almost always in coach.

My mum breaks in and says, “Sure, it’s nice that you fly first class. I had to always fly coach when I went back to England!”

Me: “I’m sure Dad would fly you first class to England now, if you wanted to go.”

Mum: “I don’t want to go now.”

Dad: “The last time you went to England was 13 years ago.”

Mum: “So?”

Me: “Want to go - no money for first class. Don’t want to go - money to go first class.”

Mum: “That’s not the point.”

~ sigh~

Anyway, from the way my dad was hinting about it, we may be flying business or first class to DC, which is our direct flight. I’ve always been in the cattle car, and considering the way fuel is going, I didn’t ever expect to be able to afford to fly first class. Of course, with it being my dad, maybe that’s not what he meant at all and I will be bitterly disappointed when we get to the airport. We’ll see - I’ll be blogging while I’m there and posting pictures at my travel blog.

Originally published at idle musings. Please leave any comments there.

I’ve been bumbling around in my world of privilege for the past 28 years, and while I think I had some inkling of some small parts of my privilege, it still really smacks me in the face sometimes.

Go read Amandaw’s post at Feministe: Is It Worth the Risk?

Reading the post made me more aware as to what some disabled people must go through to do the most basic tasks. I can relate that, in an oh-so-small way, to when I was unable to get off the couch and go to the grocery store. Or answer my phone. Or do laundry. I wasn’t physically prevented from doing so but I was mentally unable to find the energy.

There’s a great link in the comments to a site called ButYouDontLookSick.com - click here and read the Spoon Theory. I’ll wait.

I think that is such a great way to think of this. When I was in the depths of my depression, I had only so many spoons to get me through the day. If I worked, that took almost everything I had, which meant that I could only summon the energy to lie on the couch. If I did not work, I needed to stockpile spoons for when I would work next, or to have enough energy to talk to someone.

Luckily for me, my medication is working quite well. I’ve been feeling pretty good for the most part since I started taking it. (The ‘ebb and flow’ comment was awesome, Jeanie. Thanks again!) I have a bit more energy to do other things. I also have days where I don’t get out of bed until 2pm. Those are few and far between but I am now at a stage where I can allow myself to do that. After all, if I had a cold or the flu, I wouldn’t think it was bad to stay in bed and rest. Why should it be any different simply because I am mentally more sick some days than others?

Anyway. Tangent about me - over. My point is that Amandaw has written a post that exposes my (mostly) able-self privilege and being further educated in my priviledge is something that I am consciously going after.

Originally published at idle musings. Please leave any comments there.

Brought to you by Buttercup, left in a comment at Shapely Prose.

“There is no key to happiness, because happiness is not locked.”

Originally published at idle musings. Please leave any comments there.

I spent an enjoyable 20 minutes pulling weeds out from between my patio slabs tonight. M has lent me two outdoor chairs and a table, a few candle holders, a cute birdhouse, two large tubs for flowers, and a hilarious garden gnome that looks like a penis, so my patio actually looks like it gets used. We were planning on going out to Ikea and buying some stuff for my garden but we got lazy and ended up taking a 2 hour nap instead. Whoops. After dinner I had almost made the decision to not bother with the weeds until tomorrow but M pointed out that it would be nicer to do it tonight while it’s cool, and then tomorrow when I get up it will be done.

I don’t know anything about gardening and I don’t particularly like to get bugs on my skin but my mum had lent me a pair of gardening gloves so I donned those and set to work. It looks so lovely out there now! Best part - I can lie in bed for a little extra time tomorrow because I have already accomplished one chore. Whee!

Originally published at idle musings. Please leave any comments there.

If you don’t already read Shakesville, you should start.

But you absolutely should go read the post titled ‘Because You Have a Belly Button’.

Originally published at idle musings. Please leave any comments there.

Found on rock-grrl’s LJ. Had to be reposted. Just … wow.

Originally published at idle musings. Please leave any comments there.

I was in that floaty space between sleeping and waking and I thought of two cool things to blog about. Now I can’t remember what either of them were.

In other news, me deciding to nap seems to send out a signal to the world to send me phone calls and texts for the next hour.